Monday, June 28, 2010

You Schmooze, You Lose: Egalitarian Tyranny

*Originally published on 4/8/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


DJ Motherfucker may rule the program with an iron lung, but every once in a while she feels slightly selfless. This set is an example of one of those rare moments. We here at the Schmooze are proud to introduce your guest DJ for the evening, The Staff of Ra. The selections submitted tonight were of his malevolent choosing. Feel the wrath.

You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

Stereolab- International Colouring Contest
In the 1970s, musician and overall eccentric Lucia Pamela designed a coloring book depicting the people and things she saw on her trip to the moon, where she recorded her debut album "Into Outer Space With Lucia Pamela." A quirky and bubbly album that is highly recommended. Upon release of her coloring book, Pamela announced an International Coloring Contest that was open to everyone and without a deadline so all walks of life from all galaxies would have the opportunity to participate. This is the theme of this track from Stereolab, whose intergalactic Moog transmissions combined with Laeticia Sadier and Mary Hansen's warmly detached vocals honor Lucia and her big ideas.

Lou Reed- Satellite of Love
While Transformer is considered to be Lou Reed's foray into glam rock, one can still pick up on the subtle contempt at the heart of this jilted narrative beneath the Bowie production values. "I've been told that you've been bold with Harry, Mark, and John" cuts through the soaring 'bum bum bum' backing vocals and twinkling piano accompaniment. Reed's deadpan delivery reminds us that outer space is something the rest of us will experience only through watching television.

Deerhoof- The Perfect Me
An urgent and mutated wall of synthesized noise and rollicking percussion pound out a plea to the desolate on this track, which shows that a truly innovative group can make the experimental catchy and the innovative humble.

Delta 5- Now That You've Gone
A bass-driven Rough Trade single embodying the gray longing of post-punk Britain and beyond. However there's a light at the end of the tunnel in the form of going out and getting drunk...any kind of heartache can be resolved with an ample amount of booze and good times. You're gone and we're doing just fine, thank you.

Cibo Matto- Sugar Water
An adorable shibuya-kei offering that takes us through concrete deserts and invites us to bathe in sugar. Regardless of whether or not you've taken a shower today, how can you say no?

The Slits- Typical Girls
Reggae guitars bounce in time with the back-and-forth vocal harmonies on this apt description of common ladies, who are all emotion and compliance.

Kate Bush- Running Up That Hill
Believe it or not, John Lydon is a huge Kate Bush fan. While your DJ is not, who is she to argue? What John Lydon and the Staff of Ra decree goes. There is a definite momentum to this track that can't be ignored and has rendered it a classic.

Serge Gainsbourg and Brigitte Bardot- Bonnie and Clyde
Ah, Serge et Brigitte. Apparently Gainsbourg was intimidated by Bardot's breasts. But we're not here to gossip. This track is ridiculously sixties and ridiculously French. You will love it.

Cristina- Is That All There Is?
Ending the guest DJ set is a skewed and obscenely hilarious rendering of the instantly recognizable torch ballad. Cristina's version turns the subject matter of the song completely upside down and changes the tone from bewildered existentialism into razor blade nihilism. In fact, the original lyricists made sure this was suppressed. Luckily, spit and swagger perseveres.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Jeremy's Iron

*Originally published on 4/6/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


This installment of You Schmooze, You Lose is a mash-up of neo garage and old favorites. Your DJ is out of her slump and ready for action. Tonight's lineup will do the same for you, consensually or forcefully. So let's dust off the turntable and start spinning.

You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

The Clash- This Is Radio Clash
Introducing the Schmooze set for the evening is the untouchable, the undeniable, unstoppable Clash. DJ Motherfucker is kicking herself in the ass repeatedly for not including the Clash earlier. Never fear though, your silly DJ has come to her senses. So here is a track that is sure to bring you to your feet. If not, then something is seriously wrong with you.

Ken Boothe- Ain't No Sunshine
Moving right along, we have Reggae crooner Ken Booth's take on the 1971 Bill Withers Soul smash. This song has been covered countless times, but the Lovers Rock adaptation courtesy of Boothe makes it one of the standout versions. See for yourself.

Thee Oh Sees- Graveyard Drug Party
We are quite familiar with the surreal workings of Thee Oh Sees by now. But you need it in your life.

Meth Teeth- World Is Going To End Soon
A new favorite, Portland's Meth Teeth regale us not only with one of the best band names ever but also with refreshing lo-fi noise code violations.

Psychedelic Horseshit- New Wave Hippies
This track from shitgaze rabbel-rousers Psychedelic Horseshit proves that every generation has their own version of hippies, whether they're dropping the brown acid or renting lofts in Williamsburg. Abrasive keyboards and all-around hatred for all.

Baby Birds Don't Drink Milk- Jeremy Irons Couple Skate
Your DJ will admit it, she is not all too familiar with this band. Miss Motherfucker chose this track simply for the title. The thought of Jeremy Irons on roller skates does seem a bit ridiculous, does it not? Though we at the Schmoozer are confident that it would still be awkwardly sexy in a way.

The King Khan & BBQ Show- Teenage Foetus
Another group we need to do a bit more research on, and yet another selection that was chosen for the song title. Regardless, this track is a fun romp through the garage of absurdity.

Woven Bones- If You're Gold I'm Gone
Winding down the evening we have this last call sleaze fest from Woven Bones. You better stay away if you're a good girl, because these fellas want nothing to do with you.

The Fall- Totally Wired
Yes, yes, we know this is not the first time the Fall has made an appearance on the Schmooze. But come on, it's THE FALL! This selection is a classic track of post-punk paranoia. Here at the Schmoozer, we are always nervous too.

You Schmooze, You Lose: The Prodigal DJ

*Originally published on 4/4/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


After a three week hiatus, your DJ has returned from the murky depths. She has regrouped and is ready to sling her aural assault in your general direction. I have missed you, heathens. Have you missed Miss Motherfucker? No matter, we don't have time for reminiscing. The songs compiled for this set is a musical missive describing the bruises of a battered mind and a worried heart. Good news though, the Kaiser has retreated to the enemy base and the allied troops are still in tact. So onward and upward and off into this long overdue Schmooze.

You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

Silver Apples- Misty Mountain
Kicking things off is this mysterious track from the late-sixties electro duo Silver Apples. The rudimentary pulse of Simeon's hand built synthesizer evokes the feeling of impending emotional doom...but not without a few moments of ecstasy beforehand.

Spacemen 3- Transparent Radiation (Flashback)
Let's linger in our delirium with this mainline version of this Red Krayola song via Spacemen 3. The band's motto was "taking drugs to make music to take drugs too," and this adage certainly rings true with the distant strings and guitars, as well as vocals dispatched from the opposite end of reality.

Big Star- Feel
Alas, reality has to come crashing down at some point, and here it is with this raucous litany from the legendary Memphis group Big Star. This track lays down the law in clear cut terms: "You just ain't been trying. It's getting very near the end. I feel like I'm dying."

David Bowie- We Are the Dead
The theme of this reflective and subdued track from Bowie's post-glam opus Diamond Dogs is the relationship between Winston Smith and Julia from the dystopian Orwell novel "1984;" However the sad realization that the affair should have ended before it began can be taken as universal.

Low- Point of Disgust
Have you ever poured your heart out to someone, only to have your words pass by their comprehension time and time again, no matter how you strain to expound your point of view? This gentle slowcore dirge from Low believes you have.

The Modern Lovers- I Wanna Sleep In Your Arms
Tension and anxiety over love was never so upbeat. The world can be a hard place indeed, so why is it so difficult to find a set of non-accusatory arms to provide solace from the cold morning? Maybe it's not that difficult after all. Maybe we're just searching in the wrong places.

Nico- The Fairest of the Seasons
Time to take a breath from all our pondering over the irrelevant. Time to put the situation into perspective. We might still be unsure, but this lilting track informs us that it's time to move on.

Thee Oh Sees- Gilded Cunt
This muffled garage track from Thee Oh Sees reflects that slight notion of hesitation on your part as you wait for hours for someone who will never arrive. Yet you still show him that you love her (or him) and that it's all you know to do.

? and the Mysterions- 96 Tears
Vindictiveness is one thing we do well here at the Schmoozer. Just remember, no matter how bad someone might make you feel, how low they drag you, they'll have their fair share of tears somewhere down the line. They're gonna cry.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Late Night

*Originally published on 3/9/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


For this segment of You Schmooze You Lose, your DJ is getting back to business. The aural annihilation you've come to love has returned with a vengeance. This will not be an easy set to endure, but trust me...you will be a better person afterward. Or worse.

You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

Killing Joke- Tension
Starting the set off is a selection that will no doubt wake you up and put you on edge. It may even cause a little tension. This track from the ubiquitous Killing Joke will pummel your senses and make you come crawling back for more.

Psychic TV- Unclean
Moving right along we are submerged under the waters of the filthy Thames by the post-Throbbing Gristle collective of Psychic TV. Part assault, part occult, all around relentless.

Nitzer Ebb- Join in the Chant
Probably the most well known Nitzer Ebb track, but nonetheless a track with brutal beats and caustic integrity.

Pan Sonic- Vahentaja/Diminsher
You know that your DJ isn't completely heartless and is willing to let you breathe from time to time. So let's all take a deep breath and melt for a little while into this contemplative piece from Finland's electronic duo Pan Sonic. Notice, however, that this selection is not completely peaceful.

Gary Numan- Down in the Park
A foreboding and disassociated synthetic vision of a future of rape machines. You better stay out of the park when the sun goes down.

Wire- Three Girl Rhumba
It really is a crime when you think about how many bands have ripped off Wire. Most notably, this selection. But Wire was so brilliant, they were able accomplish more in less than two minutes than most other groups could ever comprehend.

Swell Maps- Blam!
A surf-tinged rollick through the delightful and juvenile aspects of being poisoned by silly games; luckily with this track we have the antidote.

Syd Barrett- Late Night
To be alone in your own mind...is a concept well captured on this track.

Magazine- A Song From Under the Floorboards
Ending the night is a track that could be considered to be a post-punk soundtrack to "Notes from the Underground." If you never get your hopes up, then you will never be let down.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Folge Neun

*Originally published on 3/5/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


After a brief hiatus, your DJ is back for round neun. There is quite a selection tonight, one that you may have anticipated in a way...but hopefully not.
Brevity is key this evening as Miss Motherfucker is ready to slam you with her new set, just in time for the weekend. So let's get to it.

You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

Toots and the Maytals- 54-46 Was My Number
Starting the shindig off is this incredible reggae track from, you guessed it, Jamaica. Penned by Fred "Toots" Hibbert while incarcerated for possession of marijuana, this is considered by some to be a definitive song of the genre. With its classic riddim and Hibbert's soulful vocal delivery, you will have a hard time keeping still and staying in a bad mood with this one.

The Pop Group- She Is Beyond Good and Evil
Next up is the demented free-form funk of post punk upstarts The Pop Group. A song worthy of Zarathustra. This selection was produced by reggae veteran Dennis Bovell, and hints of the dub slant can be heard here. Has anyone ever held you like a gun? It might make you feel like this.

Alien Sex Fiend- I Walk the Line
No, this is not a cover of the Johnny Cash song. Instead we have rockabilly-tinged guitars meeting with electronic pulse in this eyeliner-smeared venture into the gutters of London courtesy of this early goth group.

The Cramps- I Can't Hardly Stand It
Just listen to it.

Holly Golightly- You Have Yet To Win
One-woman girl group Holly Golightly tells us that she is tired of our lies. We'll never win her heart, but at least we can dance our blues away.

Sixteen Horsepower- Horse Head
A live rendition of this track from Sixteen Horsepower, a group that manages to invoke the Old, Weird America while saturating it in whiskey, bitterness and front porch creak.

Smog- Dress Sexy At My Funeral
A dead man's final request.

Dirty Three- Sad Sexy
Bemusement. Not being able to walk away. Missing a moment by a millisecond. A plethora of emotions are conjured by this instrumental offering from the untouchable Dirty Three.

Rowland S. Howard- Pop Crimes
Ending the night is one of the last songs recorded by Rowland S. Howard. We miss you so much.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Love Your Little Ways

*Originally published on 3/1/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

Maybe it's the head cold, maybe it's the champagne your DJ has been nursing all night, but inspiration struck. A break from schmoozing was in the cards, but suddenly Miss Motherfucker was overcome by the desire to broadcast a rather dreamy set for you little heathens out there. Ah, another lonely Montag.
So here we go, a brief dive into speculative sonic sway.

Swervedriver- 99th Dream
A delicious track from this forgotten shoegaze band. Everything you want is here: space travel, rock and roll, blankets of feedback, courageous vocals....music to fall in love to.

My Bloody Valentine- Slow (live)
Experiencing My Bloody Valentine live is akin to being present at ground zero during the Trinity tests. A ribcage-shattering, epiphany-inducing orgy of tremelo saturated ecstasy.

Siouxsie and the Banshees- Last Beat of My Heart (live)
Pardon the screaming on this track. It is warranted, however. Another live cut, this song of yearning and devotion echoes a commitment to the unobtainable that only Siouxsie Sioux can deliver.

Jonathan Halper- Leaving My Old Life Behind/ I Am A Hermit
Best known as the soundtrack to the Kenneth Anger short film "Puce Moment," this mysterious double-header is an exploration into self-induced hermetic pondering.

Brian Eno- Here Come the Warm Jets
Inclusion of this seminal track from the album of the same name just seemed right. Imagine barreling down the highway at 2 in the morning towards anywhere but here.

Cocteau Twins- Pandora
Indecipherable, majestic really. Everything you would expect from this group.

The Jesus and Mary Chain- The Hardest Walk
Walk of shame, walk of blame...who cares.

Arab Strap- Afterwards
A flashback to the night before. Perhaps it's true that the best part of a one-night stand is afterwards as you watch your lover get dressed and anticipate sore thighs the next morning. At least you have that much to remind you that your memories are real.

The Wedding Present- Brassneck
Ending this set is this resolute ode to corresponding with an infatuation regardless of whether or not a response is received. Sometimes writing it all out makes us feel better. Perhaps if Morrissey didn't have his head perpetually up his ass he could reach this level of endearing exposure.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Beyond Silence and Chaos

*Originally published on 2/28/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

This installment of You Schmooze, You Lose is a bit schizophrenic. We've gone off our medication and we are in Antonin Artaud mode. Tonight's set has noise. It has serene moments; and on the same token it has noisy serenity and uneasy peace. We're going around the world tonight, I hope you've packed your passports and left your box cutters at the boarding gate. I've got your weapons of mass destruction right here, passengers. Time to take off into the stratosphere of aural oblivion.

Iggy Pop- Tiny Girls
The fractured rhythm and blues of Iggy Pop's ode to greedy and seedy women is our signal for takeoff. Swooning horns lull us into a brief tale of misguided love by the Berlin Wall. Where do you turn when the one you're with has been reduced to a shell of mistrust? Try turning to the tiny girls, the little nymphs of promise. But be careful, because you might just hear the same old story of want. The downtrodden time of the beat and the world-weary groan of Iggy Pop fresh out of a dirty spoon season resonates with boarded-up cabaret grime.

MaYYors- Ghost Punch (Live@WFMU 2009)
Next, we have MaYYors, who are more than happy to slam you right in the gut. Noise rock the way it was meant to be: difficult, loud, unrelenting. Pure meanness was never so pleasant.

Desmond Dekker- Problems
Let's relax for a moment. A classic track from the King of Ska, this Shantytown bop through money woes is incredibly upbeat considering the subject matter. Everyday is problems, but when you have music like dirt, the rest is a breeze.

Big Black- Tiny, King of the Jews
While this may seem to be one of the tamer tracks from "Songs About Fucking," don't be fooled: The trademark hatred of Steve Albini is still there, still pressurized and ready to blow. The slow trudge through self-loathing is culminating in retribution. This song's goal is to rip itself apart and then strangle you with it's pale and bloody entrails.

The Nation of Ulysses- Aspirin Kid
The well-orchestrated sloppiness of an avalanche of horns bears down on our collective headache over the radio thanks to DC compatriots The Nation of Ulysses. One aspect of their plot to destroy the world was, for lack of a better term, producing a damn good song.

This Mortal Coil- Another Day
Perfection. Passion is not meant to be overanalyzed, but at the same time if it wasn't then songs like these wouldn't exist.

Nouvelle Vague- Ever Fallen in Love
To lure us out of the spell cast by the previous track is this sexed-up Bossa Nova romp through this Buzzcocks tune. Perhaps if we could convey our aches in this manner we wouldn't be spurned.

Alan Vega- Saturn Drive
The production quality of this selection sounds a bit too slick, but perhaps Alan Vega was making an attempt to distance himself from the raw power of Suicide; regardless, we can't resist this cocaine and city lights offering.

Spiritualized- Shine A Light
Ending the night is the inevitable comedown. Swelling sweetly, J. Spaceman and company take their time. It is well worth the wait, as each respective instrument in the immense Spritualized arsenal contributes their piece of the buildup...until finally...sonic bliss.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Crushed By Crushes

*Originally published on 2/27/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

This segment of You Schmooze, You Lose is going to get a bit mushy. Your DJ has not been feeling well lately. She may be tough, but she is not immune to emotions. Therefore this set is going to be kind of a high school mix tape for anyone that has kept me awake at night. The difference between this and high school, however, is that the music is much better. By the way, how did you sleep last night?
So, without further ado, allow me to spin some tears and break some hearts. If Miss Motherfucker is going down, then so are you.

Simon Bonney- Sun Don't Shine
Former Crime and the City Solution frontman Simon Bonney knows exactly how to bring us to our knees. This track, from 1992's "Forever", is what heartbreak and the sighs that follow sound like. Infatuation tends to be a dead-end road, and inevitably we will throw up our hands and concede to reality after all other words and attempts have been exhausted. The passion and intention is all here with mandolins like rain and desert guitar. Bonney's croon guides along the path of love, the path of hate, the path of naught.

These Immortal Souls- Shamed
Dear Rowland S. Howard. You were too fragile for this world. You were probably ruined by infatuation more than anyone. Is that why us hopeless dreamers flock to you? Maybe that plays a role, maybe your tender genius plays a role too. Regardless, this selection digs under the third layer of skin, a ballad full of self-doubt and self-loathing due to loving someone...but not. But maybe? The whirlwind guitars and lilting piano backed by cymbal crash drive it all in and drive it all home. If there was anyone who put our feelings into perspective better than ourselves, it was Rowland S. Howard.

PJ Harvey- The River
Hard on the heels of a break up with Nick Cave, PJ Harvey released this emotive gem in 1998. Pulled from the electric light longing of "Is This Desire?", this track beckons us to the banks of the river, any river, with subtle trumpet and hazy, mirage-like guitar repercussions. Throw your pain in the water and watch it sink.

Leonard Cohen- Stories of the Street
This ubiquitous ballad was selected for two main reasons: 1. You cannot compile a set on unrequited love without playing Cohen; 2. The final line of the song, "lost among the subway crowds I try to catch your eye." Another circumstance in which I will let the music speak for itself.

Pere Ubu- My Dark Days
A track of insecurity and resolve from this seminal Cleveland group. David Thomas' vocals sound as though he is on the verge of vomiting, either out of nervousness or out of hopelessness. Maybe both. Infatuation and cars have been written about together for a long time, but here one can imagine sitting in a rust bucket somewhere in downtown Cleveland, under a flickering street light, looking at the person who makes you tremble, but not being able to move.

The Black Heart Procession- Blue Tears
I'm a bit on the fence about this band. Some of their material is too sappy for my tastes. However "Blue Tears" is a lovely little piece regarding saline floods on account of a long gone lover. The accordions conjure the wide avenues of Paris or some other ridiculously picturesque city, a city where everyone is in love and nothing goes wrong. A city where you don't live.

Einsturzende Neubauten- Sand
A cover of the Lee Hazelwood/Nancy Sinatra duet, Einsturzende Neubauten takes 60s balladry to the junkyard. Broken glass replaces stars in the night sky, and clanging metal is inserted into the empty ditches where our hearts should be. Ever have someone stoke your fires to their heights, then slip through your fingers like sand? Here you go.

Public Image, Ltd.- Flowers of Romance
But then along comes John Lydon of all people to conk you over the head and force you to snap out of your self-pitying stupor. The mock-wishy washy violins back Johnny's spiel: living for others rather than yourself really is silly when you think about it. Flowers, chocolates, there's no point. So pack up your furniture and start all over again.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Love Like Blood

*Originally published on 2/26/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

At the end of the last installment of You Schmooze, You Lose, I forecasted Garage Rock. Conversely, I was sidetracked by the Cleveland scene circa 1975. Now, cracked out on coffee, I have been distracted once more. The mind-fuck I delivered with the last set will be continued here. Promises were made to be broken, and my new list will either inspire you to run to the nearest record store or run for the door. The set is a bit longer this time around, so strap yourselves in. The ‘fasten seat belts’ light is on and the needle on the proverbial turntable is just as hopped up on caffeine as your DJ.

Throbbing Gristle- Persuasion
First, a little persuasion to prick up your ears…courtesy of Genesis P-Orridge and company. This track sneaks in the door with a deadpan violence and taut ambience that only Throbbing Gristle can provide. The tick-tock-tick-tock opening counts down to the moment in which you give in, while the omnipotent thump and thud of the synthesizer feels you up against your will. The noises of protest from guitar and voice that are looped in reflect your resistance, but like always, you will lose your resolve. You will be persuaded.

Keith Hudson- Pick A Dub
Next up, a brief sojourn into what could be the soundtrack to a Jamaican western. The title track off of legendary Kingston producer Keith Hudson’s 1974 release, this The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly of Dub has it’s guns drawn, but don‘t worry. Those guns aren’t pointed at you. The showdown between fidgety drumbeats and melodica waves at high tide is tempered by the soft intervening hand of the bass that is just below the surface. Or above, depending on your point of view. The raw and freewheeling experimentation that lies in Hudson’s brand of Dub likes you. You should like it back.

Fad Gadget- Coitus Interruptus
Now, now, you’re not getting off that easy. But you are going to get off. Fad Gadget, AKA Frank Tovey, is going for your sexuality via Fireside Favourite electro smut. Everyone is sleeping with everyone else in this self-conscious lament over mediocre and anti-climactic sex. Still, there is a speck of optimism found here. While the grimy beat of the club may lack coyness, this futile search for love is being carried out on our own terms through ectomorphic posturing and the misanthropic thrust of the keyboard.

Thee Oh Sees- Rainbow
This selection from the exhilarating group Thee Oh Sees is the only recent track to be found in tonight’s set. But really, Thee Oh Sees are one of the few bands going these days that are actually worth a damn. If the Mummies and the Thirteenth Floor Elevators were involved in a head-on collision and knocked each other up through some miracle of gravity, then this would be the end result. Garage brazenness admixed with modern intelligence. Listen up, that is a threat and an order.

Killing Joke- Love Like Blood
If I may be so bold, a quote from your humble DJ: “Killing Joke or get the fuck out.” No middle ground here. With that being said, here's a rather heroic offering from KJ. I don't feel the need to elaborate really. I'll let the music speak for itself.

The Fall- An Older Lover etc.
I’m sure there are a few of you out there who have taken an older lover…or have at least considered it. However, Mark E. Smith gives you a fair word of warning: An older lover comes with old stories and old lies. Yet a younger lover will merely cause you to miss your old lover. The solution: forgo lovers, young and old. This selection is from the staggering Slates album, which carries all the cynicism, complexity and straightforward genius we've come to expect from the Fall. Camus would be proud indeed.

The Specials- Friday Night, Saturday Morning
Bidding us farewell to England are the Specials, the second-wave ska band that put Coventry on the map. This sleepy tune captures the feeling of an all-nighter fueled by alcohol, friends, and the good times we seek at the end of the work week. An upbeat sadness, a pang of loneliness one feels as they leave the bar or club alone at 2 am. Regardless, we always have next weekend.

Swans- No Cure For the Lonely
In just under three minutes we are torn apart. Music for the cab ride home. A song playing in the background as our lovers tell us that they do not want us anymore. Suddenly the air grows thin. Our hearts cave in. Desire is so uncomplicated, a voice and guitar only. So why does it eventually and perpetually collapse? Where does that passion we grasp for go? Why set ourselves up for the aches? The answer can be found with Swans.

Nikki Sudden- When Angels Die
Before Rowland S. Howard was taken from us, Nikki Sudden went first. The world truly is a heartbreaking place.

Suicide- Dream Baby Dream
Aww, don't fret now. There is a light at the end of the tunnel yet, and I'll guide you to it with the selection closing out the night. This may be an electronic happiness generated by the dexterity of Marty Rev, but it's happiness nonetheless. Listen to Alan Vega and keep your dreams baby. Whether you reside in New York City, Richmond or somewhere in between, there is life beyond love and disappointment.

You Schmooze, You Lose: Episode 1

*Originally published on 2/26/10@http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com

A continuation of your favorite article on musical delusion.


You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

On this installment of You Schmooze, You Lose, we are going to engage in a bit of sightseeing. Maybe the term "soundseeing" would be more appropriate? No, that just sounds silly. But I digress...
The place: Washington, DC, land of your DJ's birth. Land of politicians and half-baked hipsters. Land that I love. Ian MacKaye is a millionaire nowadays, but you can still catch him trudging around Adams Morgan on a clear day. Speaking of which, there will be no Minor Threat or Fugazi found here. In fact, only three bands in tonight's set are actually from DC. I am delving into the philosophy, the essence of Our Nation's Capitol. Nation of Ulysses has long since broken up and Mark E. Smith has advised us to leave the capitol. I for one did. Therefore this set will be comprised largely of personal reflections as well as hypothetical record spinning. This is your DJ's love letter to the District and an obituary for whatever your notions of it were.
Now, let's skip the half-smoke and dig into something much tastier: Washington's musical history.

The Cramps- Garbageman
I can still remember that glorious moment when I smacked Lux interior's latex-ensconced ass at the 9:30 Club back in 2003. "Garbageman" was the song, and as Lux stuck out his can I did what seemed appropriate. It's a shame that now he is a sorely missed pile of Rockin' Bones. The Cramps are the proverbial gun at the starting line due to their atomic influence on what would become the DC Punk scene of the 1980s. Ask anyone from Brian Baker to Henry Garfield (alias Rollins). They'll tell you.
Lux, Ivy, and Nick all stuck out their respective cans and gave this stodgy old city the what-fer with their brand of psychotic-turn blue-hillbilly-hell-in-a-wastebasket rock n' roll. Outta the crypt and into our hearts.
This song in particular, with it's municipal beat and dump truck- cum- Duane Eddie guitars combined with Lux's Louie Louie Frankenstein snarl of "You ain't no punk, you punk!" served as an announcement to Washington that they were in serious need of a discourse on the real junk. Bang, and we're off.

Bad Brains- The Big Takeover
I don't favor being predictable, but you knew this was coming. There is no way to get around the Bad Brains. I would like to, what with the homophobia, the strange ventures into reggae and the antics of H.R.; but there is no denying the explosive role this band played in the emergence of the 1980s DC Hardcore scene and beyond. The fact that they were a punk band with solely black members could have become novelty. However the raw energy and force behind the group left all cliches in the dust.
This selection makes it's move slowly with the seemingly infinite buildup of the drums. Then the guitar slides in and without warning, cracks you over the skull, cuing H.R. to scream and warble rabidly about the downfall of the U.S.A...something felt keenly in Washington.

The Make Up- Here Comes the Judge
Now to transition from a future of doom to destination love. Armed with Soul swagger and the Gospel Yeh Yeh, the Make-Up forced all the jaded hipsters to uncross their arms and, well, have a good time. Ian Svenonius' shriek calls us to attention. Is that what made him the Sassiest Boy in America? The opening track to this "live" album conjured at the now defunct DC 'temple' Cold Rice is just as electric as, say, the opening track on "Kick Out the Jams"; while both inspire us to overthrow the system and liberate ourselves, the Make-Up's shimmy shake call to action is a hell of a lot sexier.

Rites of Spring- For Want Of
The final track that originates in DC. Just because a band is emotional, it does not make that band 'emo.' That phrase is simply a cop out and a means for Hot Topic to stay in business. Rites of Spring was so much more, combining the fury of Hardcore with the passion of life itself. Has your band ever made the audience break down and cry? Alright then. This potent selection brings to the surface all the memories we've choked on, all the hopes we've ever dared to utter, all the dreams that fell short, just slightly.

Lead Belly- Bourgeois Blues
No need to go on about Lead Belly. If you don't know who he is then you live a sorry existence. Upon becoming politicized after meeting Woody Gutherie and Josh White, Lead Belly recorded this vitriolic ode to the racism of Washington. A line from this song sums it up best: "Now all you black folks listen to me don't take no home in no Washington, DC lord it's a bourgeois town." Nothing more needs to be said.

The Magnetic Fields- Washington, DC
DC can be an exciting place when you have a lover there. The traffic on Constitution parts just for you, the cherry trees stand with confidence along the filthy Potomac, and even the Munch paintings at the National Gallery smile at you. This sweet little tune from Stephin Merritt's ambitious 69 Love Songs project captures the bubbly bounce one carries with them in anticipation of seeing their District love once more. Who cares for monuments and famous names when you have someone to hold tightly?

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds- Abattoir Blues
This final selection holds a very special place in your Miss DJ's heart. Way back in 2004 I purchased this album at a little record store in Dupont Circle on my lunch break. This song in particular became a staple as I would drive up the GW Parkway at night, admiring the city lights. DC can feel like an abattoir at times, with it's easy meat and spirit slaughter. It's inhabitants rushing to and from work, packing into the Metro cars and avoiding eye contact as if it were a plague rising up from the fetid swamp this city was built on.
"Abattoir Blues" shuffles in like the Green Line to Columbia Heights, arriving to transport us to that spot on 16th Street where we found love, then lost it. Cave's determined piano pounding reflects nerves that palpitate upon exiting the train and reemerging above ground; the drums are the sound of our feet anxiously traversing cracked sidewalks, moving forward to a kiss that will never come. That's Washington, DC for you.



You Schmooze, You Lose: The Beginings

*Originally posted on 2/26/10 @http://www.djmotherfucker.podomatic.com


You Schmooze, You Lose: An Imaginary DJ Set

By Jennie Willis

During a recent exchange on Facebook, Ashlee Elfman and myself were trying to figure out what one needed to do in order to become a DJ. We both figured that a lot of schmoozing was involved, something neither one of us is really capable of. We both have the desire and the music selection, but lack the butt-kissing skills. If there are any DJs reading this, keep in mind that this is not a criticism of you but a comment on our misanthropic tendencies despite our love of music. However if you play Lady Gaga merely to fill an empty dance floor, then that is a different story.

So, for your reading and listening pleasure, here is a list of songs that I would inflict upon you if I were bestowed the title of Miss DJ at your local club or bar. No, I do not take requests.

Jobriath- Heartbeat
The soothing screech and glittery cacophony of the opening track from the lovingly compiled "Lonely Planet Boy" would be sure to grab your attention. Typically blown off as a poor man’s Bowie, Jobriath is a sorely underrated artist out of New York City by way of King of Prussia, Pennsylvania. Jobriath was the first openly gay artist, something that even the 1970s was not ready for. The music industry could take the innuendo of Bowie and Elton John, but the real deal? Nein. Hence Jobriath was sent to the confetti-littered dustbin of glam history.
“Heartbeat” Opens with Jobriath’s distinctive slightly nasal caterwaul supported by standard 1970s rock composition, as well as Jobriath’s own brand of drug addled piano playing. The lyrics give away our narrator’s adoration of a debauched friend, and the nature of their relationship is given away in the line, " and so you see I couldn't let you leave me be.” The appeal of this song lies not in it’s originality, because we’ve heard this before, but in it’s realness. Jobriath was fearless, and we are happy fools for his dear fantasy in return.

Nurse With Wound- I've Plummed This Entire Neighborhood
Now it gets interesting. Nurse With Wound, AKA Steven Stapleton, is an avant garde sound experiment out of London. NWW has collaborated with Fetus, Sterolab, and Current 93, just to name a few. This track takes it’s title from a line in the David Lynch film Eraserhead; the Lady in the Radiator song is also sampled and mixed in with what I imagine would be the soundtrack to demon possession. Deftly edited tape loops swell and swirl with electronic throbs and plenty of “what the fuck.” More of an art piece than standard dance-your-ass to the music fare, but definitely something that will saturate your brain slowly like a bucket of blood.

Crystal Stilts- Converging in the Quiet
Okay, back to reality. But not too quickly…we don’t want you to succumb to the bends. “Converging in the Quiet” is a dreamy offering from this Brooklyn-based group that hints at the Jesus and Mary Chain but delivers on garage yearning. The guitars swoon and sway in time with the gentle suggestion of the drumbeat. Have you ever walked through Manhattan alone in the early autumn, overcome with feelings of love and hesitation? If so, than this song might be for you. There is a subtle tension to this track, a sense of something unrequited but hopeful. Pushing forward without being pushy. Daydreamers, unite.

The Screamers- Matar Dolores
Hail the Mother of Sorrows. The Screamers were a band out of California during that vital decade known as the 1970s. Originally called the Tupperwares, the group changed their name after legal threats from the company of the same name. Unlike Tupperware, the Screamers did not feel the need to release a single product, i.e. album. The only documents left to us are the videos released by the venerable Target Video of San Francisco.
Combining the punk rock sneer with synth molestation, “Matar Dolores” is a visceral and cerebral ode to being ’loco en cabeza’; think of finding a drum machine pummeling a homeless woman who believes she is a saint in a urine-stained alleyway.

Anita Lane- Jesus Almost Got Me
Closing the night is the woman you wish you could take home with you. She’s working on her sixth or seventh drink, and she’s leaning in provocatively, slurring her story of lost love and redemption. Her hand grazes your arm, and through this one small gesture her inherent sensuality is made all too clear. However there is something wounded, something innocent about her. You feel your aches begin to swell, but at the same time you stop yourself because you can tell that she is not cheap and worth knowing better.
“Jesus Almost Got Me” is off of Anita Lane’s Dirty Pearl compilation. A melancholy country-tinged song, the twang smells of last night’s beer and Lane’s breathy vocals are heavy with barstool longing. Jesus hasn’t caught you yet, child.

Regailed to the Blogosphere

Due to storage limitations at the podcast site, DJ Motherfucker will be forced to clean house at You Schmooze, You Lose. It saddened your DJ to think of deleting all but current sets as they encapsulate certain emotions and thoughts that are near and dear.
So to keep all you heathens from missing out, Miss Motherfucker has decided to archive old set lists in blog form. The music is not here, but hopefully the write-ups you've come to love will be just as meaningful. Don't get me wrong, I dare not compare my ramblings to the brutality of Throbbing Gristle or the adorable croon of Desmond Dekker: but let's just say your DJ can't let go.